relationships are what we're made of

Wow, this month definitely did not quite happen on African time... it was intense! But good, intensely good.

Most recently was our fall board meeting for the general board of church and society. for some cool stuff on that you should check out awesome Beth's

blog

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There are, as usual, a few too many things swirling around up in here, so i'll settle on an excerpt from an email i wrote to a friend. Context: we're working on some legislation to bring to the Global Young People's Convocation. It's in Johannesburg, South Africa this december (i'm going! shout out to MN church in society committee for the funding!) and legislation that passes out can go to General Conference from "the young people of the UMC." Anyways, this legislation is at least a shot at saying to the church, if you really want us to be a vital part of who the church is, then we need to be about justice. To be about justice, we need justice to be integral in all resources that are produced for UMC young people.

More context: I have recently decided that relationships change the world. Not only that, but they are the only things that change us, and thus, the world. We're moved because we relate to something, because we identify with something, with someone else. This is a pretty sweet condition to be in, as humans -- it means when we forget each other, we forget ourselves...and the deeper we go into community with one another, the deeper we come unto ourselves. Anyway, I also decided that since relationships are what change the world, anything else that we do to try to change the world should be a means to an end. The end being, of course, to cultivate meaningful relationships. Educational type events, lectures, classes--these things give us background so we can better understand people and have more meaningful relationships with them. But these events are also so easily externalized, we need relationships with people to internalize them.

OK, so some thoughts behind the legislation:

young people are trying to figure out who we are. we're growing up, we're changing, we're moving in society and we're moving society. our relationships with one another are hugely important, but they're getting more and more external. we have myspaces and AIM and big youth conferences where we dance and wave our hands in the air and listen to 'cool' music and eat candy...at youth group we watch 'relevant' movies and read 'relevant' bible study book thingys and do 30 hour famines because we feel like we should do something for the greater good but aren't quite sure what that should be. we're really really focused on doing. i wonder if conservative christian theology is really really focused on doing, in general (whew, here i go, are you sensing the snowball build up? brace yourself for generalations, most of which can be qualified and all of which have exceptions). let me use as an example my friend eric, who i mentioned is having to decide whether to go on his 2 year mission, or maybe even leave the mormon church. we have these uber intense (like 9 hour long) theological debates. basically it boiled down to we realized a major fundamental difference (and the reason he's catch-22'd right now) is that the church of LDS is all about God telling you what to do, and you doing it. God says, don't have sex. so you don't have sex. God says, feed the poor. so you feed the poor. God says, you're a sinner (meaning you inadvertently don't do what i say all the time), but my son took your sins upon himself and died on the cross, so worship us and if you follow my 3 step plan you'll get a) earthly joy b) eternal happiness. So when Eric's in a church that says, God says, go on a mission and teach people about jesus...but he has a ridiculously close friend who has become integral to who he is, who not only identifies as queer (goes fundamentally against the order of the universe, of course--we're supposed to be gods and goddesses when we die, not goddesses and goddesses), but who identifies deeply with all these people all around the world who are suffering because of systems that the church of LDS refuses to confront...eric's stuck. he's scared of what'll happen if he leaves the church...and because of his relationship with me, he can't bare to go on a mission without feeling like his being is ripped in two. he keeps asking, what does God want me to DO, how can i feel peace by DOING what God wants me to...i keep saying, who does God want you go be?? (other than a subserviant minion). what if we're creating, with god, and what matters most is who we are, how we identify with the hurting in the world? doesn't doing good naturally follow?
ok i hate binaries and i think there's lots of complexity between these two paradigms, but eric's situation just hits home for me. his relationship with god was great until he became friends with a real person who didn't fit (and since then, he's suddenly been able to identify with all sorts of hurting mormons--kids who want to commit suicide cuz they're gay, etc.). in the same way, i wonder how many christians happily go along with their christian friends (or with gaps in their lives, dichotomies that they push to the back because they don't know how to confront them) focusing on doing 'what's right' and becoming someone who does 'what's right',

becoming is about stripping away layers. it's about figuring out who we are, which means we realize that who we are is made up of all sorts of stuff in society. those of us who are privileged in so many ways learn to see the world through the lens of those who are oppressed. we realize that we don't just have privilege, we ARE privilege. as young folk, we're crying out for resources that can help us figure this all out. we need study guide sessions that build up our skills and intuitiveness, that help us unpack the societal baggage we all carry, that encourage us to question the unquestionable and to be vulnerable with others so that we may all figure out who we are. as we start to identify with one another, we need resources that help us learn to identify things in society that are stifling our identities. we want to dream a world that works the way our relationships do; we want to dream a world in which every person is valued not by what they do or what family they were born into, but by who they are--which is an incredible creative gift to the community. as we defragment ourselves in our close church and school communities, we want to dream a world that doesn't fragment identities but that helps people become whole, by helping ALL people become whole. We dream a world in which every child has enough to eat, in which every person has clean water to drink and clothes to wear. We dream a world in which all people live without fear that weapons of war will be used against them; we dream of a world in which no person will fear being bombed, in which no person will live in fear of condemnation for who they are. We dream a world in which our connections to one another, and our connections to the land that sustains us, guide us.

peace out --